First time posting on HN. We're looking for feedback from parents.
We're 2 dads who started working on Dadditude in the midst of covid lockdowns last year.
Being a dad can be a long, emotional, draining, and lonely journey. Through our research we learned that dads want to improve their parenting but are too shy to ask for help, and are tired of reading content online written for mums. We set out to fix that and create a platform that would help dads feel seen, validated, and supported. By helping dads, we hope to support moms and partners too, because all parents deserve more support.
Quick timeline so far: We started a community of dads on Instagram last Feb to test hypothesis and learn about their needs. We then launched an MVP in April, a super simple app serving weekly coaching guides created with a parenting professional partner. We made several updates in summer and fall, working like crazy in the background to convince parenting professionals to write coaching guides for us. Especially hard when you're a nobody. But people are kind and we found all the support we needed. We launched a v1 app mid-December with 50 coaching guides and a more full fledge community board (and a paid membership tier). We've just added on-demand parenting professional support in Jan. And last week added a picture board for dads to upload pics of their families, and that's become more popular than the forums!! ← I knew dads wanted to feel more visible but I love these discoveries!
Super proud of the work done so far, but still so much to do to smooth out the product experience, and get closer to PFM. So much learning.
web: http://www.dadditude.app ios: https://apps.apple.com/app/id1558653576 android: https://play.google.com/store/apps/details?id=com.dadditude....
(part of the experience is behind a paywall, but you can test nearly all paid features once for free - so long as you register through Apple or Google)
All thoughts and feedback welcome in the comments below, especially if you're a parent entrepreneur. TYIA
[edited top statement to "can be long..." for the dads here who felt it was too gloomy - it was]
I guess this was autocorrect, did you mean "good" or something else?
This is a strong, negative and questionable statement.
Draining can be seen as negative but, if you see it in the same vein as "working on complex problems all day is mentally draining" (which is how I assume it was meant), then it loses that negative connotation.
That really only leaves lonely. When you consider how many moms groups there are, all boosting each other up with discussions of how wonderful they are (and, in some contexts, reassurance that they're not bad moms because of something)... dads (in general) are lonelier; they just don't have as much available support. It's not like that for all dads but, as a group trend overall, I'd say it's a fact.
Of course it's long, it's something you start often in your 20s or 30s and hopefully do for the rest of your life.
Of course it's emotional. It's one of the largest life experiences many of us will go through.
Of course it can be draining at times. It takes a lot out of you, and it can be hard after
Painting people as helpless and pathetic because they're finding something hard and still doing it and while seeking help to improve seems ridiculous.
Perhaps the issue people are having with this is that they're inserting "and not worth it" or "not rewarding" at the end, which isn't there. With "but worth it" added, would so many of you disagree?
Being a dad is fire and ice. Some wonderful times, some hard times. Not lonely at all. I get to help good, small people become good, big people, and I grow along the way.
This is also something that could be spoken from the perspective of that person.
"Being a dad is a long, emotional, draining, and lonely journey _for me_."
Perhaps the context here is that of single fathers?
You can be "lonely in a context" without being existentially lonely (though that's a very normal human experience also). Loneliness just means that at the present time, you don't know enough people who you can relate to in a certain context. You may have a million friends, but if you want to start a new career, you may be lonely in that context and feel the need to know more people in that industry. If you are newly diagnosed with a disease, you may be lonely in that context, not knowing anyone else who has been through the symptoms you're experiencing, even if you are surrounded by supportive family. And if you're a new dad or mom, you may have your spouse, you may have your kids, but you can absolutely feel the need to connect with other people who have experienced what you're experiencing.
Loneliness is just your emotions telling you that you could benefit from the presence of people who have travelled and are traveling the same road. It isn't a failing. It's fuel to reach out and connect.
The thing that myself and others found so disagreeable is that your copy sounded… maybe “whiny” is the right word?
It reminded me of the “buddy dad” that cares more about his kids thinking of him as a “best friend”, than being a father. Those are very different things.
Maybe your copy is right for your audience, depending on your goals, but it stuck a strong negative chord for me.
Email in profile, by the way. Happy to iterate and provide direct feedback, as fathers do need good resources.
Dad of more than one severely handicapped kid here. I have found the journey the greatest part of my life for going on 25 years. Not at all draining or lonely, and, because of our children, filled with joy even on days when there was tragedy.
Not trying to dis OP or the work they have done.
I think it's cool that you were able to find a community, build a knowledge base of content for, and create an app for. That's impressive itself.
I just don't think I'd ever use it. I have more than enough resources already to figure out the dad thing, this is just another one to remember and one i'd probably not trust as much as a book, close relatives/friends, vetted articles on the internet.
I fully agree on that "a blog and a forum, but in an app" opinion, but I still like that. It's hard to find sites that provides a lot of resources in clear form, even if paid. Sites with clickbaity titles with barely any content and ads on 70% of the page is becoming a on my local sites. I miss old school forums and simple web pages. I browse on mobile a lot and haven't seen more then 3-4 mobile friendly sites that were actually mobile friendly, so an app suits me.
I absolutely hate navigation and all negatives I found are UI related.
- Swipe left on every paragraph? A big no!
- It's not comfortable (physically) to do that all the time. I haven't really used an app that requires that, ever.
- It's hard to grasp larger context (especially when using second language)
- There is no way of copying text - oh come on, how am I supposed to use a dictionary, or send part of text (the app sends the whole screen)?
- Many places requires using the "x" button at the very top. Sorry, it's around 7 years since a had a phone where I could do that with one hand.
- It displays "full screen", hiding my system-native navigation buttons, so I can't get out of settings easily.
- It's even worse when reading an article - system navigation "back" button does nothing. That is just too aggressive for me.
- There is a "like"/heart button on every page, but it's hard to tell what it does. I found it eventually, but by accident. It also doesn't say where is the "card" I liked - what article was that from?
Also I find it a bit too expensive, as this will not be anything I'm relying on. I would prefer it to be one time payment, not a subscription. I know, I know, "it's just $3" (or whatever it is, I see my local currency), but to be honest I have way to many "just $3" apps and services already and am not going to invest in any more of them. It's slightly more expensive then lowest google drive/one subscription. For me a one time payment is easier to control and accept, as it feels more like buying a newspaper or book.
I will say that I was initially a bit confused by the web page; it took me a minute of looking around for a register/login link, for sample guides, or for the community boards... before I realized that the web page is just a brochure for the mobile apps and a place to link your 'gram. I prefer to consume long-form content on my PC rather than my phone, so that was a bit of a disappointment.
On downloading the Android app, I was greeted with this error message:
https://i.imgur.com/gi0MfZz.png
Hopefully that's just HN's Dad hug of doom (I'm on solid wifi and have a great network connection; it's almost certainly not on my end as the message implies).
Starting to page through the app now; looks like you have lots of content! I'll let you know when I have more time to really dig into a few articles and the features.
Another place I go to for Dadditude-like conversations is https://www.reddit.com/r/daddit. We do have a very limited policy for self-promotion, see https://www.reddit.com/r/daddit/wiki/blogs for details (or message the mods), in particular self-promotion should be <<10% of your content. But if you are already a redditor who wants to help fathers you're probably already there, encouraging and commiserating with us over people who call dads parenting 'babysitting', cleaning up the messes of our kids, and trying to be better dads...
PS: I'll echo and slightly disagree with the sibling commenter who was distracted by the first paragraph of your pitch: "Being a dad is a long, emotional, draining, and lonely journey. Through our research we learned that dads want to improve their parenting but are too shy to ask for help, and are tired of reading content online written for mums. We set out to fix that and create a platform that would help dads feel seen, validated, and supported."
Wow, that's a depressing framing to everything that follows. Try something more positive, and be willing to qualify it with some weasel words where you have to: Being a Dad should be an rewarding, amazing, fulfilling, awesome journey, that has commensurately high challenges and requirements, and it can sometimes feel draining or lonely. Asking for help is hard, and it's difficult to find quality, precise help when you do ask. We want to help dads be the best Dads they can be, recognize the work they're putting in, and support them in the important role they have in their families.
Good luck!
Remember SOS:
S = Self-awareness. You need a sense of your own insecurities, biases and an awareness of your feelings.
O = Objectivity. With that self-awareness hopefully comes objectivity. The ability to look at the world from your child's perspective and not in a manner governed by your own ambitions, dreams, fears and hopes.
S = Selflessness. This can be the grueling part. Sacrificing other priorities (sleep, work, wind down time, personal interests) to support your child in their interests, with their difficulties, and often to expose them to different activities and ideas so they can identify what is right for them.
My kids are older now, but I still run down this list frequently in my mind as a way of ensuring I am preparing the kids for life in age appropriate and healthy ways.
> and not in a manner governed by your own ambitions, dreams, fears and hopes.
and emotions, personal childhood trauma, stress...
We have some great content on "Parenting Blindspots".
r/daddit: I'm a long time lurker and I'm so grateful for this resource. Sounds like you're quite involved there. Thank you! I've wondered how I could introduce Dadditude there but I think I prefer to wait until the offering is more differentiated. Unless you think there is a way to do it now.
Thank you for the rephrasing suggestions, that is so helpful and I'll definitely incorporate some of this next time I pitch. I love the concept of weasel words (as a non-native speaker).
I was put off that I have to create an account before seeing more than just the introduction to a guide, and that at that decision point I have no idea how much the paid membership will be. Please don't hide the ball and hope to hook people. If this is $5/year, I'd go through the sign up process and see how it looks. But if it's $15/month, I wouldn't spend the time trying it out because there's an incredibly small chance that I'd end up wanting to pay that much.
Honestly it looks like most of the content is just stuff gathered from the web (or very similar to content that is free on the web), which also tempers my interest. Some people might be interested in posting public photos of their kids, but I'd never do this in a public app. Maybe I'm not in the target audience, or I'm misunderstanding. But I'm a dad and entrepreneur, so I was curious enough to check this out. Just my 2 cents!
Guide paywall, well, we offer the first guide for free so long as you register. The copy mentions that BUT it's not clear enough apparently. We'll need to work on this more. And then again, maybe the first guide is all free without registration but felt like the notice would help people choose the guide they wanted. Back to the drawing board on this one! Again, we should be clearer from the get go
Content of the guides: I see what you mean. 80% of the content is written in collaboration with parenting pros for the app, 20% is reformatted with the help of the original writers. Sure, you could find similar content online but it wouldn't be written specifically 'for dads' and we know that most dads don't look for that content online because it's a flood of crappy content written for mums. We're trying to be very specific here.
Thanks for your feedback!
Oh no, this is clear. The point is that you don't tell me what the price will be, and I don't create accounts for apps/websites that are going to charge me an indeterminate amount of money later on.
> Sure, you could find similar content online but it wouldn't be written specifically 'for dads' and we know that most dads don't look for that content online because it's a flood of crappy content written for mums.
All you have to do is add +dad in your web search, right?
Except, it isn't. I was excited that you have a web link, only it's a link that allows you to download the app. I don't want an app. I just want the content.
Is there any plan to ever publish the content you're having generated by any other means? Why not put it directly on the website?
We're working on new features that will make part of the experience more guided, and we'll focus on dads that want to work to improve their mental wellbeing and parenting. Sort of a guided micro journaling, with specific commitments around specific dad skills.
s/we're/some fathers
This isn't universal. Please don't present it as such.
Also... > Being a dad is a long, emotional, draining, and lonely journey.
Paints being a Dad as something I've not experienced. So perhaps your app isn't for me.
And your website doesn't include a cookie banner, instead just begins tracking me through Google. So you don't meet your own GDPR statement in your privacy policy.
Hard pass.
Cookie banner, apologies, we're fixing this. No harm intended. We actually track as little as possible.
I won't start using an app that doesn't let me do anything useful without paying, and I'm not going to sign up for a service if I don't know what I'm paying for, so I always look for that information up front before I even install.
I am a dad who has felt all of the things you mention and my interest in this platform is high, but you mention that you started this off as an instagram group and it sounds like a lot of your content and focus is going to be around what you learned from people that I don’t identify with at all.
I have never felt comfortable with the social aspects of social media; I don’t have a Facebook or Instagram because I simply don’t feel that the social constructs there are healthy for me. It’s not a dig at people who do it, it just isn’t for me. I like being social, I just have never felt comfortable with the feedback cycle pushed by the big platforms.
Do you feel like your platform is going to be biased or weighted towards the type of people who do value social media? How are you distinguishing yourself from that?
The social network side of things was to try and reach dads where I was able to (being a non parenting professional) and validate that dads were indeed looking for such support on this range of subjects. Dads are on social networks and it's a great place to reach out to them. We agree that social networks are a terrible interface to offer support. We use it as a beacon to say, we hear you, we see you and we have our app if you want more qualified support.
I’m a new dad with a 13 month old and look forward to using this app going forward!
I do care very much about very practical things. For example right now I'm trying to figure out a way to protect my kid from all the insane and stupid things on the internet ... while at the same time allowing them access all the brilliant knowledge on the internet.
Current plan is two wifi routers one for kids one for adults. And the kids one has a firewall I maintain .. and I'll whitelist whatever sites they request (so long as they are good sites). This maybe is difficult to maintain though.
I’m increasingly aware of my insecurities (largely thanks to The Blindboy Podcast, which started as a book promo and then mental-health-for-men and now it’s for everyone, he says, after growing up a bit more), and I’m more willing to read and learn from advice targeted at women, and not take it personally that I’m not included.
Maybe dadditude will be another bridge to better parenting in general, to help us grow up so our actual and ideal selves overlap.
Btw, fatherhood has so many attributes. But definitely not "lonely".
This statement seems like a useful filter for finding your target audience.
