I want to know what you have learned in 2015 that you never realised before. I am going to start with my self, I learned one thing: 1. Identifying people who really matters in life is super important. We generally don't think like this but when the person is not around you, you will realise how the person was in your life. And don't forget to show your gratitude you never know when it's the end.
I would really like to know your life lesson. May be some of us learn from other and can use in 2016.
Thanks in advance.
If so, is it because of what you said or not? If not, then why not and how come your 10% coding and 90% people skills still holds true according to you?
Just a curious question :)
As to why, people like working with people who are like them.
Assuming that the development part is good enough, having people skills blows that person away.
I learned my skills from various sources, but I found a coach that took me to the next level. His name is Marcus Oakey. I'm sure he is still teaching.
Things changed when we started a company...a B2B company. We started selling at the beginning of this year and I found myself in a salesman's role (lucky me). I couldn't say no to meeting people, I couldn't say no to events, I couldn't say no to going to bars after events, I couldn't say no to partying, I had to engage in everything that I thought was wasteful. I was awkward and dumb at times but it helped me bond with people. I kept away from it for far too long, but now I try to force myself to meet people.
I know this is nothing new to most of you. But it was revelation for me. In startups, sometimes you have to force yourself to go against your very nature.
How are these activities wasteful? Please elaborate. What activities would you not consider to be wasteful?
I don't go to the movies. I'd rather read a book. I don't go to parties. I'd rather work on my calligraphy. I don't drink - not even lightly - but I see heavy drinking as a complete waste of time (literally blacking out or not having memory of most of the previous night).
If I ever have the feeling of "I'd rather be doing something else" then chances are what I'm doing is a waste of my time. I should be doing that something else.
Soo... to answer the question... and hopefully without sound to glib, I'd say "take your health seriously. Stuff creeps up on you". That is, all the warnings you hear about "eat right, exercise, keep your cholesterol down", etc... yeah, that stuff does matter. And yes, it can happen to you. I know, because I was one more person walking around thinking "that stuff only happens to other people" until I was on the back of an ambulance wondering if I was going to die.
I really don't like being the preachy type, but if I have any useful advice to share, I'd say it's this... invest in taking care of your body. And by "invest" I mean, time, knowledge, money, exercise, food, whatever elements you need to leverage to maximize your health. Read a book like Cholesterol Clarity and understand how this cholesterol stuff really works. If you're a little overweight (or a lot) find a way to start getting more exercise. Buy a bicycle, or a skateboard, or a surfboard, or just some comfortable walking shoes, whatever. Throw out the Doritos and sugary sodas and shit. Learn to eat healthy. Quit smoking if you smoke. That sort of thing.
- stay away from people who have shown bad character traits in the past (e.g. cheating, violence, drug abuse...) even if they downplay/justify it and behave reasonably towards you for a long time
- Severe health issues can creep up on you even if you have no symptoms and live a reasonably healthy life (no smoking/drinking/weight/obvious environmental issues). I apparently lost either the genetic or Chernobyl lottery and had a rare tumor removed that nearly left me quadriplegic. My typing speed is now approx. 1/5th of what it was before and my hands ache all day, but fortunately I can still walk and do most things like before.
Some people will observe the effect of drugs on themselves and avoid them or limit the consumption because of it.
Some people will actively seek drugs despite the risks and downsides because they want an easy solution for life's problems and that's the character trait I mean.
-- Cut down all sugar. I started to take my tea/coffee without sugar. And no sweets. Try to take a fruit when have the urge. Which resulted in a drop of 2.5 kgs of weight (better BMI)
-- Realizing that yelling at family members (e.g. kids) make you unhappy later on for a long time, with guilt/etc. Better at it, but its obviously a perennial work-in-progress
-- Off Facebook, for some months. Always had the power to quit and had quit intermittently couple times before. But the last stretch I was fooling myself that I need to be on it, to share interesting stuff with some friends I like. (Now when I really have an urge to share, just bcc select friends in email. But this mode and thought process may change again.)
Can you share more on this?
Hard work and dedication pay off. Don't stop fighting for what's right.
I decided to stop being a miserable S.O.B. halfway through this year, and it's made a difference to everything from work to home to health.
Also, don't go seeking stress and strife out. They'll come to you often enough, you don't need more.
Happiness is an emotion; joy is an attitude.
(clearly this doesn't work at too fine a level of granularity, as there are always important tasks which if not done lead to bigger problems, but at least be able to connect those tasks to a bigger good outcome.)
The lesson is that any day I can make marginal gains is a good one. Focusing on achieving on a day-to-day basis has made working on my startup -- a big long term project -- much easier.
As my ankle improves, so does my life along with it. Small gains and small steps forward.
- even smart people will react very differently to same events, mostly because of their context/interest/values.. but most of all, emotions.
- until the money is in the bank. many people will bs you, but you never really know everything until someone actually takes action or commits.
- scalability of an organization depends on its people. the leadership, the hubs(influentials), and the values/culture. the structure comes after.
- never give up. we got accepted to YC on our 2nd try.
His final advice was to include more people in everything I do (family, friends, coworkers, etc), and to "go have joy". That last bit is meaningful because I am overly concerned about the future.
Not a wild insight I know but still new to me.
I worked a lot on myself this year and I have achieved far more than I would ever hope for. I am now transitioning. I also found a job that I love, that is well paid, have growth opportunities and where everyone knows and accepts that I am transgender. All those 2 things required a lot of work (and really a lot of work) but damn was it worth it.
I am now happier than I have ever been and looking forward to 2016!
At this point, it's either I start at the very bottom, competing with people fresh off school who are willing to work for next to nothing, or make some loans and take up a new college degree.
If you write down a goal on a piece of paper and think of a plan to achieve it, you will definitely achieve it NO MATTER HOW BIG OR IMPOSSIBLE IT MAY SEEM.
True story.
