There's nothing cynical about it. Experienced candidates know what corporations are and how they work, and they know that employment is a business relationship. Its purpose is not to make either side "happy" but to exchange value for value on agreed terms. It is not a family relationship, friendship, or psychologist-patient relationship. In that context, your question to candidates is out of line. Answering it nontrivially helps you but not them; it gives you more leverage, and more opportunities to make promises you cannot or will not keep. Your argument may be that you wouldn't do that, but how is the candidate to know? They don't know you; you just met. The sensible thing to do is to keep one's cards well hidden.

> I would think the possibility of not being miserable for a third of your life would be more than enough incentive.

So, your argument essentially boils down to "tell me what I want to know or I'll make your work life a living hell."

Please tell me the name of your employer. I don't ever want to work at the same company as you (or, at the very least, I don't want to be on the same org chart as you).