Why is it that we think that kids are somehow meaner now than they were at any other point?
While you and yours may have the support structure and innate tendency to become stronger as a result of early-childhood bullying, I think the schools' argument is that the potential harm in a student being bullied to the point they hurt their future educations/careers is greater than the potential good of bullying for those who can withstand it.
Social fortitude is like any other aspect of development in that some children will obtain it sooner than others. Those that get there first become the popular kids and the kids that simply don't care. Those that don't arrange themselves into ``safe'' cliques or take what the other children say to heart and believe that they are stupid/ugly/weak and will never be able to change. If the parents are not available, the school would need to be able to provide individual support to nurture these kids to the point where they can stand up for themselves. This is difficult in public schools, so the alternative they are using is to encourage all the children to spend time together.
Now, devil's advocate aside, since I believe I can provide the type of supporting atmosphere that will help a kid toughen up, I would likely not send my child to a school like this. However, faced with the problem of unreliable parental involvement, I can somewhat understand the school position.
Seriously.
Stop it.
Here's the only piece of data in this article:
Most children naturally seek close friends. In a survey of nearly 3,000 Americans ages 8 to 24 conducted last year by Harris Interactive, 94 percent said they had at least one close friend.
Hm. Looks like that might indicate the exact opposite of this article's thesis. Fortunately, the journalist has found some really powerful individual anecdotes!
“I just really don’t have one person I like more than others,” Margaret said. “Most people have lots of friends.”
I'm no sociologist, but the problem with this datum is kind of obvious. Nobody but a social idiot would, using their real name, tell a newspaper reporter that "I have twelve friends, but only one of them is a really close friend". That's a good way to lose eleven friends.
http://inmedias.blogspot.com/2010/06/if-any-friendship-coach...
But more seriously, there is an approach implicit in the article that I have seen quite often in schools and large businesses. Because leaders are unwilling to do the hard work of examining problems on a case by case basis and creating solutions (Often because they are unwilling to suffer the criticism that indiviual decisions create) problems are approached from rediculous and overly broad perspectives. (See for example Zero Tolerance policies in schools, airport security, etc.) Being unwilling to confront bullies in this case is leading to the deliberate elimination of best friendships. By making it a policy, it eliminates having to make hard decisions, one can now simply say, "Policy says...." and punt.
This kind of meddling makes me sick. Dear educators, stay the hell away from my kids.
