As an aside, I joined facebook to write this, and I was blown away by how good facebook's recommendations for friends were, presumably just based on other people's uploaded contacts (Facebook made me confirm a phone number).
e.g. If you are someone@example.org, and others have someone@example.org in their address book and they let Facebook see it, they've got you already.
For this reason I use a dedicated email address for each social media account.
Also, while I'd normally recommend 2-factor authentication, giving these guys your phone number is a really bad idea if you value your privacy. Try to limit it to firstname lastname and one throwaway email if at all possible. If you're really paranoid, you can get a VOIP gateway that supports SMS for fairly cheap, certainly for cheaper than buying a burner phone.
Search online for 'Facebook shadow profiles' to get an idea of why this was so good. It's more than just your phone number.
Edit: And you also say "Use a different app for instant messaging" but (since you're going for the privacy approach) that should not be WhatsApp and photos should not be via Instagram. Most people have no idea that these are both Facebook properties.
My question is, at the end of the day what value is facebook bringing to us? Does it become a glorified contact list at that point, or is there something I am missing?
This is aimed at the average computer user, who doesn't know what third-party cookies are, who doesn't know what retargeting means, who doesn't realize what giving facebook their email password does. It's a way to give that person tools to pick the degree to which they expose themselves, when the default is 100% exposure.
Basically, a family member asked me this question, and I thought it would be useful to write up for them. I figure folks on HN have the tools to figure out how they want to deal with FB and other services, but they may also want a resource to help friends and family who aren't so tech savvy.
If you are interested in the rationale for my objecting to 100% buy-in on facebook and have 40 minutes, I can highly recommend Maciej Ceglowski's talk at Beyond Tellerand 2014, the internet with a human face: http://vimeo.com/102717446
most of my cohort have already emigrated so not sure I will join, as I survive without it. currently use emails of various lengths - from a sentence and a html link - to quite wordy ones.
