I suppose I'm lucky insofar as I had my bad luck in my 20s, when it was easier to recover than in one's 50s.
Much knowledge can only be gained through misery and suffering. Since humans are mostly defective, it's rare that a person who hasn't suffered, been betrayed, etc. knows how people actually work.
Additionally, understanding how human organizations work is no substitute for real-time footwork. Ideally, one wants both. I have a wealth of the first (and, unlike Welch, I'm willing to share what I know) but (unlike your garden variety corporate psychopath) I'm not good enough at reading people to develop that "snake sense" for others' weaknesses. In the field, that's also very valuable, and it's something I never developed.
I mean, I get it: There are plenty of people who are less deserving than you that have been wildly, disproportionately successful. I can understand why you're envious. But don't kid yourself, most people would kill to have the supposedly miserable failure of a career that you've had.
Nah, that's not what it's about at all. It's definitely not about the salary. If you're a novelist and you make even a quarter of that number at mid-career, you're a huge success.
It's about autonomy, importance, reputation, etc. Personal financial stress (which I have suffered, although most of that was because I picked a bad startup, thus my fault) is toxic sludge, but the difference between comfortable and rich means zilch. What does matter is control over one's destiny, rather than being blown about by others' political games, and having the resources to implement one's own ideas rather than being a tool in someone else's box.
Software used to have an R&D flavor, but we've let ourselves become a colonized, defeated tribe. As a consequence, we have to deal with closed allocation, project management bullshit ("story points") and constant political intrusions on the ability to do our work properly.
I've realized (perhaps too late) that it's not my fault, because no one really has that authority based on technical ability alone. One really does have to suck it up and play politics. As I get older, I realize that my negative experiences are ridiculously common. Most people hide away in shame when bad things happen to them in their careers. I won't. To protect the good, I come out, throw down and fight.
I can understand why you're envious.
Envy != resentment. I'm not a very envious person, but I take pride in resenting those with undeserved success. They get into power, make bad decisions, and it's almost impossible to flush them out. They're a cancer. I'm the chemo.
Envy is wishing one had another's unfair or undeserved advantage. Resentment is pushing toward fairness. You're not trying to grab that coveted token or advantage for yourself (that would be envy) but you're trying to expose its stupidity and render it meaningless. Envy is an emotion; resentment is an attitude and somewhat of a social strategy.
My emotions toward the Evan Spiegels and Lucas Duplans of the world (I don't feel much either way for them, to be honest) are irrelevant. What is relevant is that they make good anecdotes, and when they embarrass themselves they can be cast in such a way that they take down other, much more important, targets. Does Lucas Duplan deserve to be ridiculed more (or less) than any other young douchebag? Not really. Should we mock him mercilessly if it casts aspersion on the chickenhawks who backed him? Yes, absolutely.
Your reasoning is this:
I am extremely clever and I have a certificate to prove it!
I have chosen an extremely lucrative career.
Why don't people see how important I am? Where is my respect?
And then you say things like "I take pride in resenting those with undeserved success", "They're a cancer. I'm the chemo." and "most of [my failures were] not my fault".
Do you think statements like this foster respect for you?
Would you respect you?
I can give you a few advices (with your intelligence you are aware of them anyway though might not have been acting on them so far): 1) start your own business(es) that can be automated to a large extent. You'd spend 1 hour a day running it, making adjustments and in time it would grow to sustain you 100%. There are still a plenty of areas you can focus at, you might have avoided them because they are "easy", or "anyone could do that", "uninteresting" etc. Yet they give you a recurring income that would give you freedom to pursue whatever you want to do. 2) accept (and give) only partnerships when working with someone, on fair terms 3) do a reasonable long-term investing, 80% "stable", 20% risky or whatever reasonable ratio suits you 4) when forced to work on something due to economical circumstances, sudden change of directions due to acquisition etc. with which you can't agree, stop using your emotions there and do the average expected work, while preserving energy and attention to your future opportunities 5) retain your integrity. Compromising yourself weakens you immensely 6) make sure you are on top of your game all the time - get excellent at chosen difficult MOOCs, do some new thing with an utmost focus (arts?), anything where you can get a real feedback about your capabilities and progress
You should understand you hold enormous power even as an individual. Perhaps because of your past generosity or good will you didn't use it or were led to believe that you can't do a lot of things - I think your subconsciousness is rebelling to such thoughts, hence the strong reactions you have. You can literally bring whole companies to the ground if you wish to, or create something unique that empowers others in a good way. Most people become mediocre, uninspiring, "happiness" pursuers, take some kind of blue pill, yet still thinking they have the best ideas, are brilliant, master minds etc. They will never understand what is going on once you start utilizing your mind to improve some small part of life for everyone.
Why is that your definition of success?
"Having the resources to implement my own ideas" is daft; I very likely don't have any (new) ideas worth implementing. How many people have lived since the early days of the industrial revolution? Call it 20 billion[1]. How many genuinely useful not too niche machines have been invented and programs written, not counting the same program reinvented over and over and over. Tens of thousands? A million? There just aren't enough new things for everyone to invent.
So instead of new ideas, maybe I/we could reimplement existing ideas - do something that someone else has done, in our own way. But how is that significantly different from "being a tool in someone else's box"?
Elon Musk makes cars, he's got control over his own destiny! He's following his dream! He's not a tool in someone else's box, he's not pushed around by others political games! That's success!
Wait, he's not pushed around by others' political games? Tesla cars have to meet all kinds of regulations. Tesla the company does too, for accounting, finance, taxes, advertising, customer interaction, etc.
The cars have to have pedals and a steering wheel or no customer would be able to drive them. They have to fit on a road, and behave in common car-like ways or no customer would have use for them. They have to look like a car or no customer would recognise what they are or wouldn't want to be seen with one. They have to be petrol, diesel or battery powered because there isn't anything else they could be that fits all the lots-of-requirements.
And yet you say "It's not money that makes Elon Musk a success, it's because he has the freeodm to shape the doors his way!".
But he doesn't have the freedom to shape them his way, he has the freedom to shape them like car doors and nothing else.
A false sense of freedom is a strange definition of success.
You could find as much limited freedom while working for someone else.
[1] http://www.prb.org/Publications/Articles/2002/HowManyPeopleH...
After having worked awhile, I'm pretty sure I'm able to tell the difference between people who really know what they're doing and people who are faking it. I've never been in a position to make hiring decisions, so I haven't had a chance to use that skill.
Man, what rotten luck.
