Not because I think EIR positions are fairly allocated among deserving people, but because you've clearly fixated on something as petty and irrelevant as EIR positions at venture capital firms.
What in the world could possibly matter less to young entrepreneurs than EIR positions?
And yet here you are with stories about EIRs used to hush up things that happened at business school or bribing Senators. You've taken the time to actually tell yourself stories about them. About EIRs. The most boring feature of a VC firm. The guy they bring into the room to screen you when you're not compelling enough to get a meeting with an associate.
If I'd been offered an EIR position at a VC firm, I'd worry about what I'd done wrong, shortly after checking my hairline and hair color to make sure I hadn't suddenly gone grey and bald.