It doesn’t read as if they actually care about broad appeal, given their plain refusal to accommodate traditional procurement processes

To me it signals honesty. But this is a subjective judgement. It really sounds like you subjectively disliked the page, and you're trying to present that dislike as objective fact. It really annoyed me the way you kept changing your argument to justify that. Why not just say "I dislike their marketing copy, it rubbed me the wrong way" and leave it at that?

It seems that you work a lot with managers who have no clue what they are buying and why.

I mean, you're not wrong: buying enterprise software from Oracle or Microsoft or Salesforce is pure pain.

But nobody expects buying niche hardware from a tiny vendor to involve the usual 128 pre/post sale meetings and 256 hours of professional services.

Also, relevant VP buying these things usually do understand the difference between AMD and Nvidia stacks really well. Like, really-really well.