I went for a walk to think about your position. I do not think you are wrong. If you refused to name a person in a situation like this, I would never try to convince you otherwise. That is why it is hard for me to make a case to you here, because I do not hold the opposing position. But I also find your argument that I should have not done so unconvincing. Both seem like reasonable choices to me.

I have two tests for this. First: what harm does my comment here cause? Perhaps some mild embarrassment? It could not realistically do more.

Second: if it were me, would I mind it being done to me? No. It is not a big deal. It is public feedback about an insulting computer program, no one was injured, no safety-critical system compromised. I have been called out for mistakes before, in classes, on mailing lists, on forums, I learn and try to do better. The only times I have resented it are when I think the complaint is wrong. (And with age, I would say the only correct thing to do then is, after taking the time to consider it carefully, clearly respond to feedback you disagree with.)

The only thing I can draw from thinking through this is, because the authors of the program probably didn’t see my comment, it was not effective, and so I would have been better emailing them. But that is a statement about effectiveness not rightness. I would be more than happy doing it in a group in person at a party or a classroom. Mistakes do not have to be handled privately.

I am sorry we disagree about this. If you think I am missing anything I am open to thinking about it more.