I appreciate your frank oppenness to feedback! I'd like to give you some, but first I want to call out that (1) I'm certainly no expert and (2) you may have been voluntold to make a powerpoint on material that isn't well-fit for powerpoint.

My feedback:

- I think you could improve by being more excited / exciting (the Death By Powerpoint slide deck says "passionate"). Personally, I try to mitigate this problem by drinking coffee shortly before I'm expected to be engaging. It is a drug, and for me it works.

- You could also draw the main impactful points out of the background info. The presentation you give here has a lot of deep technical detail, which is certainly of interest for the correct audience, but I think generally fits poorly in a powerpoint presentation. I think you'd generally want to focus on more high-level performance characteristics, or particularly interesting details. Perhaps a 3-4 page document would be better for this sort of deep technical material. Or maybe the level of detail is actually perfect, and I'm just not the correct audience.

I really love your response here. You seem like a great person, I think your coworkers are lucky to have you.