I went to a brutal and oppressive public school in a 3rd world country yet I was able to interact with the adults around the age of 11-12. I was always one step ahead of my 3 years older sister. I think a lot of this was I was jealous of her getting attention from thrme other adults and especially my parents from an early age. I self learned how to read and write when I was 4, exactly at the same period she was learning at school.

This resulted in quite a bit of psychological problems for me, since I always thought my peers are stupid. You start to isolate yourself, and this trying to impress adults changes form into trying to impress your boss etc.. My parents had no idea of course, so no use to blame them. But fir my own kids this is something I'm trying to keep an eye on. I think it is possible to distinguish what is genuine and what is for getting positive confirmation and attention. The best measure is the capability to entertain yourself. If a kid is able to not get bored when with adults without interaction they have a healthy amount of self confirmation.