Upgrading from 4 to 8 gigs last week helped a lot. I'd go to 16 except her MBP won't support it.
I'd love to get her on an SSD but she's on a 1tb drive now and it would be hard for her to try and fit into a 512gb SSD now (especially now that she's on the D800 with huge video files and 72mb raw photo files.
It's frustrating that it will work find some of the time and not others, implying that the problem could be fixed with better memory management. I do hope that a serious Adobe competitor arises to force Adobe to make its apps faster and more resource efficient.