". Or in my case where my wife regularly points out she is effectively my and our children's PA"
As someone with aspegers it took me 30 years to realize this type of communication. It's so open but without emotion that I assume they don't care. The reality is often they are trying to be nice about expressing their frustration
I've said this sort of thing myself and every time genuinely either didn't care or said it out of some measure of pride. I wouldn't have thought people use it this way either.