No, not getting the gaming console he asked for.
Thanks!
If he's got the degree, he's prepared enough. After he gets a job, you'll be in a position where he won't really be practical to get those "Wow!" gifts for anymore—entry-level salary for new grads is pretty great.
It's basically the last "easy" gift you'll ever be able to get him; past that, everything else will require serious thought if you want to give genuinely meaningful gifts. And there are certainly worse gifts to give someone than something he'll likely use almost every time he gets bored for the next few years.
If you're very insistent on not getting him it though, get him a TAOCP (The Art of Computer Programming, by Donald Knuth) boxed set. This would allow you to line up gifts for future years, too, because TAOCP is not a finished series yet, so there will be new entries for the foreseeable future.
that is how it should be.
yet, people are grinding leetcode to get through the hiring process.
Anything 'useful', or industry/professional related, are particular, specific things that he can get for himself, as and when necessary.
Anything 'meaningful', well, you'd have to figure that one out yourself - what would your son find to be meaningful? Certainly you don't think fun, or relaxation, or what he wants, holds any meaning for him. And certainly not reward. So you definitely don't think he should get the message that hard work actually pays off beyond being given more work to do, and tools that make him focus on work, because you think the only meaning of his life is to work, and that he shouldn't have fun except on your terms and when and how you allow.
He already has the objects he needs for professional development - a laptop. I'm sure he can figure out how to dual boot on it if he wants to dev on linux. Maybe the most meaningful thing you could do is let him make decisions - he'll never learn how to if you keep trying to control him just a little bit more.
*This is a(n obvious) generalism. I am aware some of us actually do go and read TAOCP - I have read some of it myself. I will profess that, on balance of probabilities, TAOCP will be a heavy and pointless shelf-weight if bought for OPs son.
A gaming console is literally a uniquely-designed purpose-built computing device, so aside from being a useful bit for recreation, it could lead to professional curiosity.
IMHO it is a little condescending to immediately get this person something work-related unless asked for. It communicates the message that their free time should be devalued, and you don’t view this milestone as something to be rewarded, but rather a reminder of your present perception of them lacking in professional accomplishment.
I don't play much anymore (and I'm not sure what console he asked for), but if I did I would be looking at the SteamDeck. Seems pretty interesting, as it is a Linux platform (based on Arch Linux), and therefore it can be used as a Linux computer as well as a gaming console (unlike e.g. a Nintendo Switch). Could be useful to learn Linux (which is necessary for software engineers).
You mentioned CE. Not sure how much he is into radio stuff, but the FlipperZero device seems to be quite a success, and it may fit the CS/CE profile. Could be a powerful educational "toy".
I don't know what your financial situation is, but CS/CE pays well, he can get his own console no problem. Once you're working "things" become easy to acquire. I bought so many things that I never used. After a while, things came to have no value.
Getting someone work stuff is like gifting a vacuum. Like, yeah, it might be useful and even practical, maybe even thoughtful, but it's a tool of work. Life isn't about work. Buy that useful work stuff for him, but not as a birthday or life event celebration.
If I were you, depending on your family life, I would go to a fancy dinner or trip with him and try to have a real conversation. Maybe talk about what you were like in college/trouble you got into, ask him how his college went. Talk about your first job. Talk about how you made friends and who your friends were. Talk about some events that made you happy or sad. Maybe he's not ready for that, or maybe he already knows it all. Of course that might be uncomfortable for both parties, but growth doesn't occur without discomfort, and closeness doesn't happen without vulnerability.
Consider investing in introducing him to hobbies (maybe dance classes, music classes, travel) where he will frequently be in contact with other people. Maybe choose some exciting activity he's expressed interest in if that's an option.
The irony of tech is that to be a good tech worker, it's your life outside of tech that sustains and powers it as well as sustaining and powering continued learning.
I wouldn't ask "how can I help my son run his engine harder," but I would ask "how can I help him stay fueled?"
Work is not a sufficient condition for life satisfaction, only a necessary one.
- A nice ubiquiti access point (wifi router).
- Smart lightbulbs (nanoleaf) / other cool home automation.
- A nice mouse/keyboard (but this is very much personal preference)
- A good waterbottle / fun coffee mug (can never be too hydrated)
- Basic home fitness equipment (yoga mat/exercise wheel/etc) if they work from home
- Balance board if they use a standing desk
I would personally not do something learning related. Companies usually sponsor pluralsight / oreilly memberships.
I would get him the gaming console, but otherwise maybe nice headphones?
Devs spend a lot of time with a keyboard and they will last a decently long time so imo it could be a meaningful gift.
I’d highly recommend checking out the mechanical keyboard subreddit for inspiration.
- Noise cancelling headphones
- Raspberry Pi
- Ergonomic Chair
- Ergonomic Mouse
- Means to purchase high quality prescription lenses that filter out blue light
- E-Ink Tablet
LeetCode Premium - every big company is using leetcode-style questions when interviewing candidates. If he wants to get a well-paid job, he needs to master LeetCode.
He'll be doing a lot of sitting down staring at a screen for the rest of this life, and over time this will fuck his back up.
Best to start fighting against the inevitable health conditions early on.
Sounds like gaming console and... Cracking the code interview, and Leetcode subscription.
Go for the gaming console. His company will give him a laptop.
Disclosure: I made this as a side gig. Use HAPPYGRAD for 15% off.
