When I pause it’s because I’m trying to compose a response and my emotions. Sometimes too fast a response sounds less credible and often times it is — I’ll ramble on a bit longer than I’d like or talk my way into my larger point, possibly losing my audience or saying half baked things. It also often prompts more details from the person I’m talking to to fill the void. This gives me more context so I don’t just answer the superficial question. But mostly it helps keep emotion out of my response.
As an aside, while I’m OK-to-uncomfortable on the receiving end of the pause, I get wildly enraged when people say, “I don’t understand” without trying to play back or suss out meaning, eg “I don’t understand, are you saying…?” I find it wildly dismissive. But that’s probably on me.
