That said, regarding your perspective on crypto's limited utility, I just want to point out there's a crypto few folks have paid attention to which actually addresses your issues head-on: Nano is a feeless and PoW-less crypto which has been around for a few years and was started by one of the early contributors to Bitcoin. Nano is not a "hot coin." It's seen little market speculation and it's not programmable and riding the smart contract wave; it does one thing well: transacting. It's free (as in truly and completely free, fee-less, zero cost), near-instant (<1 second transactions/validations), and green a(~0.1Wh per transaction, or for context about 1/6 millionth of the energy cost of a single Bitcoin transaction). It's also decentralized, without being mined/staked, so it's not controlled according to the interests of miners/whales.
This seems to me the holy grail, so I'm always surprised that discussions of crypto on HN don't mention it or even that that veterans like yourself don't seem to know about it. Maybe it's still too young/obscure? But I think it will see significant interest post-crash as it fulfills the initial promise of crypto—it's money you can by a coffee with, send across borders at zero cost, make micro-micro payments with, etc... you know, like real money, just better.