- lots of arguments about things you considered small

- issues focused on “disrespect”, which is a perception thing that she had 100% control over

- needed to resolve issues immediately

- “resolution”, if it happened, took up to six hours with no option to end on your side

It sounds like she has some major issues that probably warrant professional help.

To be fair, you may have issues as well (e.g., things that are “minor” to you may be a big deal to most people).

If you want to resolve this internally, I recommend going to a relationship counselor/psychologist alone and just doing a reality check. Make sure you present her side to the counselor as reasonably as possible.

You will probably find a few things you could do better, but you will probably also find that you were being controlled by someone with major issues.

Fwiw, I think ending this relationship was a good idea.