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0 pointssolumos5y ago0 comments

Is this supposed to be like Stripe for student loans? It's extremely unclear what the problem is, who has the problem, and how you're solving it.

> Give your products student loan superpowers

Not clear who your audience is here. Mobile games? Disposable razors? CBD gummies? Savings accounts? Whose products is this for?

> Use our API to create life-changing student loan outcomes for your customers - freeing up cash they can save, invest and spend

Same here. Are you going to give my disposable razor customers life-changing outcomes?

I'd recommending killing all of your copy and replacing it with 10% of the word count, except targeted at the specific problem you're solving.

0 comments

bomatson5y ago

Killer, thank you! Appreciate the feedback. Do you work in copywriting by chance? We're mostly eng so could always use help in this arena :)

To answer your question, yes we are stripe for student loans. Automating every aspect of student loan repayment for fintechs and workplace benefits providers.

solumosOP5y ago

No sorry - I'm also eng. YC has a few resources that should be able to help you though (see below). Something that they stress is "clarity of thought". "Student loan repayment automation for workplace benefits providers" is a great starting point :)

https://www.ycombinator.com/library/6q-how-to-pitch-your-sta...

bomatson5y ago

you rule, thanks!

j / k navigate · click thread line to collapse

0 pointssolumos5y ago0 comments

Is this supposed to be like Stripe for student loans? It's extremely unclear what the problem is, who has the problem, and how you're solving it.

> Give your products student loan superpowers

Not clear who your audience is here. Mobile games? Disposable razors? CBD gummies? Savings accounts? Whose products is this for?

> Use our API to create life-changing student loan outcomes for your customers - freeing up cash they can save, invest and spend

Same here. Are you going to give my disposable razor customers life-changing outcomes?

I'd recommending killing all of your copy and replacing it with 10% of the word count, except targeted at the specific problem you're solving.

0 comments

bomatson5y ago

Killer, thank you! Appreciate the feedback. Do you work in copywriting by chance? We're mostly eng so could always use help in this arena :)

To answer your question, yes we are stripe for student loans. Automating every aspect of student loan repayment for fintechs and workplace benefits providers.

solumosOP5y ago

https://www.ycombinator.com/library/6q-how-to-pitch-your-sta...

bomatson5y ago

you rule, thanks!

j / k navigate · click thread line to collapse