On my current team, I'm considered to be the most thorough code reviewer. Folk usually thank me rather than scorn me, though. Some are afraid to send me their PRs not because they fear my feedback, but because they think reviewing their code will take up too much of my time. Reviewing code thoroughly doesn't take much time at all, though, if you make it a habit. If it's a bug, I explain my concern and suggest a fix. If it's a style nit, I link to the relevant style guide section. If it's a suggestion or personal preference, I explicitly say that, write out my rationale, then offer to chat more. If it's a weak suggestion, I tell them right off the bat that I'm fine either way. If it's a strong suggestion, I try to give them an "early out" by suggesting they simply add a // TODO comment. I'll let a coworker get away with murder as long as they leave a TODO comment.

For new team members that send me a PR for the first time, I typically send a message at the start describing what they should expect. That helps a lot, because everyone's first few PRs are going to be rough until they've gotten up to speed on the existing team's expectations.

I will say that there are some engineers that just don't take technical feedback well. When they join an existing team, they can be stubborn and refuse to adapt to the established culture. Instead, they either misinterpret criticism as personal attacks, or get frustrated and insist that the team conform to their preferences right off the bat. Team culture can and should evolve over time, but it requires respect and understanding of the status quo. It's possible for an open minded engineer to join a team, embrace its current culture, then radically change it all over the course of a few months. It's possible for a close minded engineer to not get more than a dozen PRs approved over the course of a year. Not to say that such engineers are good or bad one way or another, but rather folk should seek out projects that are compatible with their personality.

In my org this can be somewhat of a problem (different teams have different code style guidelines for long historical reasons which can make cross-team changes tricky).

One thing that helped a lot with this is publishing these guidelines in a central location, but more importantly we also made bots that reviewed every code review to point out common mistakes that people made, so reviewers could focus on the change itself instead of naming/spacing nits.

Fear driven development is toxic.

It doesn't eliminate the people problem, but it does limit its scope.