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0 pointsslightwinder5y ago0 comments

> There are inherent sexual dynamics in any social circle,

Yes, it maybe there, but no, It's only a problem if people make it one. It's not there by default and unavoidable.

> I don't think the current trend of perceiving any unwanted sexual interest as inherently bad is at all healthy for society.

That's a pretty hostile view.

> P.S: i know and remember a lot of my friends who found their S.O. through facebook so it being alive arguanly disproves the assumption behind

There is a difference between making friends and eventually hooking up with one/some of them, and going out to make victims on purpose.

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4 comments · 2 top-level

totony5y ago· 2 in thread

>Yes, it maybe there, but no, It's only a problem if people make it one. It's not there by default and unavoidable.

It seems to me unavoidable that human would look for sex. The notion that sex is pillar to human endeavour has been a strongly held view of a lot of psychologists. I also don't believe sexual social dynamics are a problem (but im not sure if thats what you were saying).

>victim

This mentality underlies a very unhealthy view of dating imo. You don't have to be friends with someone prior to dating them.

slightwinderOP5y ago

> It seems to me unavoidable that human would look for sex.

Sure. But there are proper ways for it. Legal ways. There are reason why those behaviours more and more get outlawed in different countries.

If someone makes it clear they are interessted in dating, then yes, go for it. But just to exist is not a clear hint for this. Dating is still special case of social interaction, not the default.

> > victim > This mentality underlies a very unhealthy view of dating imo.

This has nothing to do with dating. The victims here are mainly the people who are forced to cope with that crap, but never asked for it, and don't wanna date any of those people for whatever reason.

The joke here is, we do have elaborated spamfilter and adblocker to get rid of all the annoying crap in our mailboxes and webbrowser, and most user accept it as neccessary because ads are just aweful. Yet we still don't have filters for dickpics and sexual harrasment. Quite funny, just because it's Humans doing the same, instead of business?

totony5y ago

>If someone makes it clear they are interessted in dating, then yes, go for it.

But showing clear signs of interests is exactly what you seem to be against. If no one is allowed to start an interaction then how is it supposed to start?

>The victims here are mainly the people who are forced to cope with that crap, but never asked for it, and don't wanna date any of those people for whatever reason.

It seems to me like a simple fix; when someone approaches you you tell them "sorry not my type/interested/looking."

Or just block messages from people you don't know.

I'm not keen to destroy all social interactions for the sake of the people who cannot handle them.

> Yet we still don't have filters for dickpics and sexual harrasment.

I see where you're coming from, but I disagree with your solution, which is to just prevent any interaction that's sexual in nature (although dickpics are not the same thing as what op was suggesting).

meekmockmook5y ago

Molesting? Catcalling? Holy cow, is that cynical. You think the women I met and the friends I made are victims? These are people I still stay in touch with 15 years later. Who said anything about dickpics except for you? The internet has become truly grim if any non-monetized form of looking to hook up or hang out can be considered an act of violence or harassment.

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