Downvotes can feel very unwelcoming, even when they aren't intended to be. Especially if they aren't followed with a comment pointing out how to do better. I try to reserve my downvotes for questions that seem hopeless, but I leave a lot of comments. It's funny that Stack Overflow is now attempting to make downvoting more common, after going on recently about how they wanted it to be more welcoming.

Votes to close are worse of course. There's no more direct way to say you don't belong here.

> Neither of these are intended to be considered rude or unwelcoming.

OK, sure, that's not the "intent" but both downvotes and VTC's really ARE considered unwelcoming and are very harsh on new users especially when coupled with smug comments.

I've been on SO since the early days. I've learned to brace myself for hostility when asking or answering a question, but it still makes me cringe to see new people getting burnt to a crisp over persnickety stuff. There's a lot of people that find the harshness distasteful, but their reaction is mostly to ignore it (I usually do that). Others actually applaud the harshness and justify it with, IMHO bogus, arguments like yours about "scale" or not wasting expert's time.

The bottom line is it COSTS NOTHING to be polite and empathetic. If you don't want to help out an earnest newb, that's your prerogative, but you don't have to write anything, you don't have to spend a second to downvote or police the question.