Amateur programmer to paid professional in 60 days. What lang/stack?

If you want contract work, find clients. Spending sixty days learning a language or stack is just avoiding that hard problem. Learning a language is pretend work that avoids the hard part of finding clients: dealing with a lot of rejection. Good luck.

Target the market of the geographic region you plan to work in. You might get a feel for what's in demand by looking at job websites.

To reliably get a job in my local area, I'd jump on the Microsoft stack. C#, ASP MVC, Sql Server.

Web-based software dominates the job market just about everywhere. So basic competence with HTML, CSS, and javascript will serve you well.

Probably Javascript/Node and a bunch of frontend frameworks like React/Vue/etc. You'll have lots of competition and pay is on average lower than for more esoteric technologies, but the market for that is huge. Almost every company needs frontend devs.

There is two things you can do.

One is target your local job market for anything that will still exist post-pandemic. The second is target one of those online developer mills like TopTal, BiersDev, and that means implementing the 'mother of all demo apps' repeatedly from spec until you have a fully tested and optimized app ready for deployment in whatever language you think you will most likely find a job for (javascript/expressJS, React, etc). See https://n0x400.1mb.site/ for the MIT webdev crashcourse

I agree with BRUDGERS - get clients - and for the tech part, it is hard to beat making simple web sites with word press.

Reach out to non-profit organizations that you could support. Ask if they have a website that they would like to build, however small. Offer to build it. Or build a website in 60 days that showcases your skills and has some dynamic elements and looks good on mobile.

Good luck, the point is to start building now - clients and projects.

With many people reducing their hiring and more devs with experience on the market, you might want to rein in your expectations. You may also want to because it is highly unlikely you can accrue the necessary skills and find employment in 60 days. Think more like 6-12+ months depending on if you get a structured education or try to self teach.

I'm hearing a lot about COBOL being in demand at the moment but really it'll depend on what sort of tech shops near you are hiring, have you looked at local job postings?