That's a strange response. I never complained, and I certainly never looked for sympathy. Also, is the martyr comment directed toward me?

My story is more one of explaining how what I experienced could be invisible, as nobody came to me and said, wow, you must have gone through a lot. But people do go through a lot, and it's often invisible. In my case I "volunteered" for it, but others may be expected to take it on, which I imagine is more stressful.