well, baby steps. I started a website during medical school, and it consumed much of my free time until I quit medicine. I didn't quit to start a website, but my website allowed me to quit.

Maybe music/show business is different? Forgive my lack of familiarity with the terminology, but you can't form a band, book gigs, do weddings, etc...?

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Ken_Jeong <- this guy was a physician while he developing his stand-up, and is now a sit-com actor.

Fun Fact: Kevin Smith was toiling away for years at the very convenience store in which he filmed Clerks. He used the stuck shutters at the beginning of the film as a plot device as well as to hide the fact that they had to shoot almost entirely at night while the actual store was closed.

You can do both. You SHOULD do both. Something is obviously holding you back, and there's no way we can pretend what that is. I've found wives and SOs are really flexible if you lay it out that it's something you NEED to do.