https://hbr.org/2013/04/in-the-company-of-givers-and-takers
I am extremely selfless in helping colleagues who ask me for help, and I would like others to do unto me as I would do unto them. To me, that sounds perfectly fair, and well aligned with the greater organization's goals.
Regarding some specific points you made:
- I spend a lot of time thinking about exactly what I'm going to say, even before I send the first hello
- It typically takes me only 20-30 seconds to write out the message immediately following the hello
- If someone happens to be busy and doesn't respond immediately to my message, I have no complaints. This is equally true whether or not I start off my message with a "hello", and is irrelevant to this discussion