One of the better ways to do this is to to take the lead. Be a leader, not a follower. That can be interpreted multiple ways: organizing events, inviting people to things, asking what you would like, not what you "want", even taking dance lessons (something like Salsa), not caring about the outcome so much...

Some wisdom from a book from the Ask HN Books thread [1]

> - choose carefully what you give a f*ck about, but when you do, do it right

> - there will always be problems, deal with them and move on, it's your own responsibility.

> - the constant pursuit of a positive experience is in itself a negative experience, acceptance of a negative experience is a positive experience

Also, Systems Not Goals

http://jamesclear.com/goals-systems

[1] https://news.ycombinator.com/item?id=13243705