Saying someone is wrong is not personal.

Saying you can tell what they did and didn't do, wrt source material, is more personal.

Telling someone to "get smarter" is entirely personal.

I'm a moderator here; sorry if that wasn't clear. You're most welcome to continue commenting in the thread, but it's important to follow the values of civility and substantiveness when doing so. Instead of telling people negative things about themselves, such as that they didn't watch a video or aren't educated in psychology, edit all that personal stuff out and use the freed-up space to teach the reader specific things. That's what we're here for.

For example, I'd love to learn more about what Heinz Kohut specifically says about empathy. That sounds deeply interesting, and if your comment had contained a neutral description of that, it would have been a fine contribution.

And yes it's true that moderation comments are off-topic. They're also tedious to read and (let me assure you) to write. Unfortunately they're a necessary evil. We do have some ideas for changing HN's software to make fewer of them necessary, but it's hard to say whether that would work.