But Powershell people dismiss the bash and Linux model of "everything's a file", too, the same way others dismiss the Powershell model. They're different; neither is "unquestionably" better for all cases.

Personally, once I start wanting stateful objects I can pass around to multiple methods, I switch from Bash to Python or Rust. I don't think Bash fits that use case well either, but that's not the only use case around.